A Disaster Between Two Trainers
by Dragonclaw02
Summary: A collab between me and TheFerengiKing. Yugo gets sucked into a portal that appeared, and lands into Jaroslava's universe. Then Grey comes along and steals Sandslash (Spiky Ball of Sand) and Reeka (Lucario). Now to two idiotic trainers must get the starter Pokémon back in this disaster of a fanfiiction! (I suck at summaries, rated M for my paranoia).
1. Chapter 1

**Oh look, a collab. This is probably going to suck, but I don't care. If your wondering, this is a collab between me and TheFerengiKing.**

* * *

CHAPTER ONE:

One day in the lab, K-01 was drinking a bottle of 500yr old wine, except he wasn't able to finish it so he dumped the rest of it on the portal cube machine. The result was K-01 teleporting into another universe. But wait, Jaroslava is supposed to be in a different universe.

What happened in was something else teleporting Jaroslava. For K-01, that will be revealed at the end of the story. The portal mismatched some stupid crap together and a swirly portal appeared in a universe with a tent. The universe was were Yugo was sleeping in a tent and alongside was his Lucario, Reeka. The portal came along and said, "I'm gonna ruin this man's career", and teleported both of them, still sleeping, off to another universe and appeared in a dark room.

Yugo yawned out loud and turned around, feeling the… hard cold floor. He put his hand around, then opened an eye and looked about, seeing the darkened room with some sort of noticeable furniture. Yugo got up and looked around, then asked, "Anyone here?"

No response. He called out louder, "I said anyone here?!"

A Sandslash woke up and looked around, then saw Yugo. Yugo looked down to the Sandslash and asked, "Oh, hey there. Does your trainer or friend live here?"

It blinked twice and pointed to where Jaroslava was sleeping. "Surprised he slept through that. Um, do you have a name?"

It blinked twice again, "Sandslash."

"Oh, I thought you had an actual name."

"I do, it's just a stupid one. Jaroslava calls me Spiky Ball of Sand."

"I believe it."

Another yawn was heard as it came from Reeka, who turned over and saw Yugo and Sandslash. She asked, "What the hell is that thing?"

The Sandslash turned to face the Lucario, "What if I ask you that same question?"

"Then I'll punch you in the fucking…"

Yugo stopped, "Reeka, it's a Sandslash, and he's the Pokémon of…"

He was suddenly cut off as a trainer shot out of bed and tried to get up, only to fall and hit the floor. "This douche."

The trainer got up and asked the Sandslash, "Spiky Ball of Sand what just happened?"

It pointed two claws to both Yugo and Reeka. He looked at the both of them for a few seconds, then asked, "Who are you people?"

Yugo asked, "Do I look like a fucking starfish to you?"

"No, but you can put an ice cream cone on your head and you'll look like one."

"Oh, so you've seen Spongebob as well?"

"Yes."

"Well, in that case…"

Reeka flipped Yugo over onto his back as she growled, "Ok, shitty jokes aside, who the hell are you?"

"Jaroslava, and what are you? Humanoid blue tall Houndoom thing?"

"I'm a Lucario idiot, we're as common as a Gardevoir."

"But what is a Lucario?"

"It's what I am!"

Yugo intervened, "Ok, ok, I'll show you an entry."

He pulled out his ItalyDex, and popped up the Lucario section, '_LUCARIOS:_

_Lucario, the Anubis mind reading Pokephile Pokémon. This thing can read minds, blah, blah, blah. _

_The stats are good seeing the attacks as a six, the defense and HP as a three, and the speed a as four. The moves include: feint, aura sphere, missile jab (How the fuck do you do this?), and hurricane kick. _

_The typing is now steel and fighting with the weaknesses being fighting, fire, and ground types._

_The food is the same._

_POKEMON BULLSHIT ALERT: The reading distance is not half a mile. How the fuck did you calculate that? Also, if this thing can move shit around like a psychic type, BULLSHIT!_

_DERPEDEX BULLSHIT ALERT: Ok, now I'm pretty fucking sure this aura shit does not allow you to pick shit up. _

_In notes, C7 has a couple things right for once: They are sued as wank material, they have natural sense of justice, like superman, and that they need a friendship thing to evolve. Also, keep drowning 'dem Lucario's in the pool! Try buying your own and drowning them.'_

Jaroslava said, "I've never heard of it."

Yugo mumbled, "Idiot."

"Hey! I heard that!"

"Oh really?"

He kicked Jaroslava in the balls, sending him on the floor, "Ya can't hear that, can ya?"

"I heard me hitting the floor. Does that count?"

Yugo kicked his head and knocked him out. Then he asked, "Ok, what's part two?"

Then suddenly, it's raining tacos. Yugo looked outside and inquired, "Who the hell is seriously controlling this?"

A random voice from was heard, "Me!"

"Aaaaand, I'm gone. C'mon Reeka."

He was about to take Reeka along with him, only Jaroslava woke up, and then a huge explosion in the wall happened with a brown haired asshole busted on in and tossed smoke grenades everywhere, and before the two trainers knew it, Jaroslava was hit with a baseball bat multiple times until he fell unconscious, and Yugo got blow torched, then got wacked with the baseball bat.

When all the smoke cleared, everything looked normal. Except the Lucario was gone and there was a giant hole in the wall. After an hour of being unconscious, Yugo woke up and found himself on the floor, with his head hurting. He stood up, and looked around and called, "Reeka?"

No answer. "Reeka?"

Still none. He went around the bed, around the room, and then out the giant hole and he screamed, "REEKA!"

He went over to Jaroslava, pulled him up, and shook the crap out of him, "REEKA'S GONE!"

Jaroslava woke up and said, "It's not my problem! I don't care about your blue-yellow-black canine! I care about my Pokémon! Not yours!"

Yugo put a Deagle to his head, "Oh, it's now your fucking problem because I need her to help me kick grandpa's ass, and you don't help, I'll either blow your fucking brains out, or I'll send Emma out and have her decapitate you."

"Grandpa? You mean your Oak's grandson?"

Yugo fired the gun into Jaroslava's right arm, "WANNA LOSE BOTH ARMS!?"

Jaroslava looked at his right arm, only to see the bullet come out and the arm heal itself. Yugo was not amused, "Oh, in that case."

He fired several bullets into Jaroslava's balls, arm, legs, and eye. Jaroslava fell to the floor, only for Sandslash to crawl out of its hiding place and watch the bullets in its trainer fall out and the spots that got shot heal. Once Jaroslava finished healing, he got back up and turned to face Sandslash, "Maybe we should leave."

Yugo was still going to drag this asshole along, "Oh no, Emma, get out!"

A Snivy appeared on the floor, with her two knives in both hands. Sandslash kicked its trainer in multiple places, then Jaroslava fell down again. The Sandslash walked up to Yugo and warned, "You might want to have some more powerful Pokémon with you as the green Pokémon isn't going to do much."

"Phef, why? You can't handle a little Snivy?"

"No, I'm too lazy to fight so I'm using Jaroslava."

"I'm pretty sure that the trainer has a Pokémon fight, not the other way around."

"Well, I can use Jaroslava. You sure you want to fight?"

"Fine, if it gets him to help me, let's go!"

Sandslash went to Jaroslava and opened his backpack, only for it to explode it its face. Ignoring the garbage and laptops that are now spread around the room, Sandslash took out a wooden stick with a purple liquid on the tip of it and stabbed Jaroslava with it.

Jaroslava started to transform into his werewolf form, and once it was done Sandslash asked as it was holding Jaroslava back from attacking, "You sure your Pokémon can handle a werewolf?"

Yugo was looking ready to shit himself, but Emma's expression didn't change. Instead she sprouted six vines, each holding a leaf blade, and made two longer blades on her knives. Sandslash let go of Jaroslava and he charged at the Snivy and tried to slash it, but…

Emma threw her blades, and slung her knives, slicing Jaroslava, cutting off his arms, legs, and even ripping him to shreds, as Yugo passed out of seeing the cute little Poké brutally maul up someone. Sandslash pulled out a USAS-12 from under the Pokémon center's bed, then fired it at the Snivy. Emma slipped through and sliced up the gun, or at least breaking it enough, and wrapped the Sandslash around in her vines.

Now with the Sandslash ready to piss himself, Emma decided to make Dragonclaw02 wince by kissing the Sandslash, which triggered a bomb to explode which killed the Snivy.

(Suddenly!)

Yugo jumped out of his sleep as he was still in the same hotel room with Jaroslava on the floor. He just had a horrible nightmare. He looked around and saw that Reeka was missing along with the Sandslash. Yugo pulled Jaroslava up, "HEY IDIOT, YOUR POKÉMON IS MISSING!"

Jaroslava shouted, "WAIT WHAT?! WHERE IS IT?! I NEED THAT IN THE FUTURE TO PAY MY TAXES!"

"Um… ok, but where the hell did she go? Reeka doesn't wander off… unless she decided to ditch me and go make out with your Sandslash… nah, she wouldn't do that."

"What if we both look for our Pokémon since we have nothing better to do?"

"Yeah, let's do that."

And they walked out through the hole of the Pokémon center, and went on a journey to find Reeka and Sandslash.

(3rd POV)

Grey and his Charmander Aleertle unpacked the two Pokéballs that contained Sandslash and Lucario and put them in a room that contained loads of other Pokéballs that were also stolen. After putting them away, Grey returned Aleertle to its Pokéball and closed the door.

When the door was closed, Sandslash got out of its Pokéball and looked around, trying to figure out where it was. The room was entirely beige with white lines on the bottom and top of the room. There were no windows, only a door and a single lamp in the middle. Reeka busted out and looked around, then screamed, "WHERE THE FUCK AM I?! Oh, you again."

The Sandslash shrugged, "I don't know where we are, but the door over there is locked." It pointed a claw at the door that was at the end of the room. Reeka made a bone rush, "Stand back."

And she slammed it against the door, ripping it off the hinges. Reeka looked back, "No troubles wimp."

Sandslash dug its claws into the ground which caused an earthquake the swallow the walls of the room, "Who are you calling a wimp?"

Reeka growled, rolling her eyes, "Ugh, instead of dick fighting me, let's just get out."

However, before they could get out, Grey, Aleertle, and a Squirtle came into the room. Grey asked, "So why are you leaving? The door out is camouflaged so you can't get out. Aleertle, use Flamethrower on the Lucario, and Sulad, use Hydro Pump on the Sandslash."

The Charmander spat out a massive burst of flames at the Lucario, dealing loads of damage as it was super-effective while the Squirtle shot out a large blast of water that hit the Sandslash and nearly made it faint. Both of the stolen Pokémon were now weakened so Grey tried to send them back in their Pokéballs. Only the still made bone rush went spiraling into Grey's head, throwing him against the wall, then Aleertle used another Flamethrower to try and help its trainer.

Reeka passed out on the floor as Sandslash passed out as well, only then for the two to get sucked back into their balls and got put in a safe by Grey so they don't escape again. The door was once again closed as hidden laser triggers appeared all over the room.

* * *

**Well, I guess this seems right because I'm using bold!**


	2. Chapter 2

So, this chapter took over a month to update, mostly because I forgot to do it. It was last updated on the 24th of May I think, but don't worry. This story will never be discontinued, only complete. If you were waiting a very long time for the next chapter, then here you go!

* * *

**CHAPTER TWO:**

**Yugo and Jaroslava were walking up the street of Pewter city, as they tried to find where the mysterious son of a bitch stole Reeka and Sandslash. As they walked, Jaroslava held the upside-down map while Yugo said, "Ok, so where do we go from here?"**

**Jaroslava dragged his finger around the map, "So we go right, then down, then right, then into a wall, and get killed by Zubats."**

**Yugo took the map, "Give it to me before is hoot you. Ok, so… no wonder you made no sense, the maps in a fucking foreign langua… wait."**

**He turned it right side up. "Never mind."**

**And crumpled it up and threw it into a bush. "The guy probably doesn't even use maps so we just walk around and get bored, get a beer, and find someone. Also, shouldn't we have some kind of Pokémon out?"**

**"****I guess."**

**Jaroslava sent out his Arcanine, then some blond person jumped out of a bush and asked, "Did someone mention any alcohol?"**

**Yugo fired a bullet into the guy's head. He then sighed, "Ok, I guess I'll send out… Ghezirha."**

**Yugo threw his Pokéball and out came a smiling Absol. Jaroslava said, "For some reason hearing Ghezirha reminds me of pudding."**

**"****Why?"**

**"****I don't know."**

**Ghezirha asked, "Who's he?"**

**Yugo said, "This is a dick named Jaroslava. Jaroslava, this is my Absol Ghezirha. She's very… attaching."**

**Ghezirha smiled, "Why?"**

**"****Should I really explain?"**

**Jaroslava asked, "Attaching? You mean the move Magneton uses?"**

**"****No, as in… um… how can I put it nicely?"**

**Ghezirha just bluntly put it, "I love Yugo."**

**"****Aaaaand, that's what I didn't want to say."**

**Jaroslava said, "I'll just ride Dog that's On Fire to wherever Sandslash is."**

**"****Yeeaah, and if you fall off, you're gonna get some nice marks."**

**"****Who said I was going to fall off?"**

**Jaroslava got on the Arcanine, only for the fire Pokémon to toss Jaroslava off and cause him to slam into a tree. Yugo walked over as Ghezirha followed behind, "As you can see, stupid makes stupid… or in this case walking is better than riding an Arcanine like an idiot."**

**Jaroslava got up and sent out his Pigeot, "Ok then, I'll ride Energetic Bird That's Annoying!"**

**He climbed on his Pidgeot, then started to fly away on it. He only got 40 feet in the air before the Pidgeot tossed him off. He crashed into the dirt as Yugo asked, "Does any of your Pokémon like you?"**

**Jaroslava answered, "No..."**

**"****Oh well, there is just walking, now get your sorry ass up and let's go."**

**And the two began walking with Jaroslava catching up.**

**(At Grey's layer)**

**Grey opened the metal door that lead to the safe where Sandslash and the Lucario are and tossed a Turtwig (who was sucking on a cookie) in the door. He then slammed it shut, then pressed a button that activated the lasers again.**

**Aleertle was watching the area to make sure no one escaped, but when Grey left the lights started to flicker, but the Charmander didn't notice.**

**(Meanwhile inside the safe)**

**Sandslash was using Rock Tomb, Earthquake, Slash, and Focus Punch to try and break down the door, but it didn't even do a scratch or a dent. However, the Turtwig used Solar Beam, Leaf Storm, V-create, and Rock Wreaker. The safe's door then exploded and Aleertle fainted from the blast of all the moves.**

**After all the commotion ended, Reeka stepped out and ordered, "Alright, let's move it before that ass comes back."**

**Then Grey slammed the door open and saw all three of the captured Pokémon and Aleertle unconscious on the floor. He panicked and grabbed Aleertle and threw it at the Sandslash, who dodged and made the Charmander hit the wall. Reeka made a bone rush and swacked Grey in the head, throwing him against the wall, and rendering him unconscious.**

**Everyone now had peace and quiet and could escape, but a Squirtle, a Diglett, a Lugia, a Slowpoke, and a Voltorb bust down the door and started attacking. The only issue was, the Diglett tossed several hellish hand grenades and burrowed out of the room, and before any of the other Pokémon could react, all of the grenades exploded and thus made everyone (but the Diglett) faint.**

**(At Jaroslava)**

**He was getting lost by walking around a tree in circles. Yugo, alongside with Ghezirha, looked at him with a confused look as she asked, "Does this guy know what he is doing?"**

**Yugo answered, "If I gave him 100 dollars and said to go fuck Reeka, he still wouldn't know."**

**Jaroslava stopped walking in circles and shouted, "I KNOW WHAT I'M DOING!"**

**Suddenly, before anyone could respond, a Growlithe with four tails for hands flew to the two trainers and spat fire all over them. After that it flew back into the sky and was never seen again. Yugo, now burnt to a crisp, mumbled, "If that was Grandpa's fucking creation I swear I'll kill this idiot."**

**The Growlithe came back and spat burnt toast at Yugo, then flew away. "Damn you."**

**It came back and ate a tree, then flew away for a third time. "Is there even a story here?"**

**Ghezirha asked, "Who are you talking to?"**

**"****I... don't know."**

**Jaroslava joined to conversation, "Can we just go and find Spiky Ball of Sand?"**

**His Pidgeot went out of its Pokéball and repeatedly pecked its trainer.**

**Yugo face palmed, "Your Pokémon hate you worse than mine does with me."**

**Jaroslava sent Pidgeot back into its Pokéball and replied, "Your white-dog-with-horn-thingy doesn't seem to hate you."**

**"****That's... a long story."**

**"****Can I hear it anyway?"**

**"****Alright, fine, basically I found her, I treated her nice, and in the end I find out she kissed me and... you can guess from there."**

**"****You got married?"**

**Ghezirha gave a happy smile to Yugo as he just had a sweatdrop, "Uhh... no, but with the way it's going... it might happen."**

**Jaroslava asked, "So your starter is that?"**

**"****Uh, no, it was Reeka."**

**Then Jaroslava pulled out a book and said, "According to my The Cheap Trainer's Guide to Pokémon, your starter Pokémon would wind up as your highest level and most enjoyed Pokémon, unless your highest level Pokémon is one you like very much. Then this rule doesn't count."**

**Yugo asked, "And what stupid shit-for-brains wrote that?"**

**"****According to the cover of this book, it was printed by a Gena and a K-01."**

**"****Hmm, I get the feeling their morons."**

**"****But at least this book is useful!"**

**Suddenly, the Growlithe from before swooped down and stole Jaroslava copy of the book, then flew into the sun. Yugo pulled out his own little 'Dex, "How 'bout we just use the ItalyDex?"**

**Jaroslava asked, "It looks like my Pokédex, so what's the difference?"**

**"****My grandfather wrote it."**

**"****You sound like that Green person I heard of."**

**"****Who?"**

**"****Oak's grandson."**

**"****You mean Gary?"**

**"****I said Oak's grandson, not a snail."**

**"****No asshole, Gary is Oak's grandson, he's the current professor of his grandfather's lab."**

**"****No, Green's Oak's grandson and runs Viridian City gym."**

**"****What? No, the bastard runs a lab."**

**"****Actually, I got a fame checker so let's see who's right."**

**Jaroslava pulled out a device from his pocket and pressed a few buttons on it, then it gave the message, "Green is Professor Oak's grandson and is the owner of Viridian City gym."**

**Yugo went searching, "Two can play at that game."**

**And showed on his REAL PokéDex: "Gary Oak, current owner of Pallettown Lab. Grandson of Prof. Oak."**

**Jaroslava took out a portal cube and started pressing buttons on it as he thought it was a phone. Yugo asked, "What is that?"**

**As Jaroslava kept pressing buttons, he answered, "I think this is my phone."**

**"****Uh, that's a cube, this is a phone."**

**And pulled out his IPhone.**

**K-01 came out of the portal cube and took it away, then got teleported back to the lab. Jaroslava searched in his pocket and found his phone, "No wait, this is my phone."**

**Yugo looked at it and insulted, "It's a fucking rock with buttons drawn on it."**

**"****No it isn't! I can make phone calls on it!"**

**"****Ok, show me."**

**Jaroslava pressed a few of the 'buttons' and pretended he called someone. Of course, Yugo saw the trick and said, "Very funny, now let's move on because if your Sandslash is with Reeka, two things will happen and one you might not like."**

**"****Like what? They kill each other?"**

**"****I was figuring more like Reeka killed Sandslash… or the two fuck and have an egg, I don't know."**

**"****But they aren't in the old guy place!"**

**"****The what?"**

**"****You know, the place where an old guy holds your Pokémon hostage until you pay a certain amount of money."**

**"****Hold on, you mean a daycare?"**

**"****Yes."**

**"****HA! You don't need a daycare, all you need is the two to be alone for more than five minutes, either you… no wait, you're not gay and that doesn't work like that. Uh… basically, all you need is for them to be alone and to like each other enough, ok?"**

**"****No, from what I've heard is you leave two Pokémon in the old guy place and they multiply and fill all your Pokéballs."**

**Yugo asked, "Where is this source you're referencing? Because it sounds worse than Grandpa's."**

**"****Some random guy in the old guy place said that."**

**"****Then he's a shitty source."**

**After the argument over eggs and old people, a random person jumped out of the bush and looked between the two trainers, then yelled, "I challenge you to a battle!"**

**Silence took hold as Yugo asked, "Which one of us?"**

**"****You."**

**"****U mean F U, rite?"**

**"****Exactly, F U."**

**Yugo took out his deagle and shot the guy's arms and legs. He reloaded, "Waste of seven bullets."**

**Jaroslava responded, "I think you just got roasted."**

**"****No, if anything we'd both get roasted… if Rebecca was here."**

**"****Who?"**

**"****Judas's soon to be girlfriend."**

**"****Who?"**

**"****He's a drunken werewolf hunting weirdo from Ireland."**

**"****Who and where?"**

**"****Ireland is a country next to Britain, a werewolf hunter is somebody who gets high and thinks werewolves exist and attempts to kill them, only to find out that they killed their neighbor's dog."**

**"****Okaaaaaay."**

**"****Exactly."**

**(To Reeka and Sandslash)**

**As Yugo explained Europe, Reeka and Sandslash were on the floor, finally waking up, saw the mess of burnt metal and bodies that were sleeping. Reeka looked around and ran out the door before they woke up, leaving Sandslash behind. Sandslash used Dig and dug a hole.**

**Running down the hallway, Reeka kept her pace up until a dusty explosion happened with Sandslash busting through and crossing his arms. Reeka asked, "Can you get out of the way dammit?"**

**"****No, I need to find Jaroslava before he kills your trainer."**

**"****And why is that? Have you seen the times Yugo went ballistic? He nearly killed someone himself."**

**"****Is your trainer a werewolf?"**

**"****A werewhat?"**

**"****A werewolf!"**

**"****What is that?"**

**"****A mythological creature that transforms every full moon, then kills people uncontrollably during that time."**

**"****Are you sure it isn't that demonic Greninja ghost?"**

**"****No, it's a half-human half-wolf."**

**"****And a wolf is a?"**

**"****Think of a Houndoom."**

**"****Please, those aren't bad, all ya do is have a Houndoom fuck a human and you have this werewolf thing of yours."**

**The Sandslash threw its small arms in the air, "Not that way! You can only be bitten by one, drink water from a wolf's footprints, or inherit it!"**

**"****Ok… and let's just go with it. When exactly is this full moon?"**

**"****I don't know!"**

**"****Well, since that discussion is over, let's just get the hell out of here!"**

**"****Okaaay."**

**(Meanwhile…)**

**Yugo and Jaroslava were currently lost and heading into Fuchsia City, and Yugo was having a "great" tour of the place. Mainly it was walking about in circles until they reached a tanned house. Jaroslava suddenly pointed to the building and shouted, "Wait! I know this place! It's the house with fake grass and killer Pokémon for only 500$!"**

**Yugo asked, "I'm sorry, did you say killer Pokémon?"**

**"****Yes!"**

**"****Why the hell would you want to buy a killer Pokémon?"**

**"****No, you find the killer Pokémon."**

**"****And… why?"**

**"****To catch them and get GHM thingy."**

**"****GHM?"**

**"****The thingy that contains splashy splashy move."**

**"****Fuck?"**

**"****What?"**

**"****Exactly, but why would you want a killer Pokémon? I got Emma, and she might look cute but she's a killer Pokémon with three murders under her belt."**

**"****You found an 'Emma' in this place?"**

**"****No, no, Emma is a Snivy who I got from a Pokécenter."**

**"****What is a Snivy?"**

**"****Here."**

**He pulled out his 'Dex and showed the picture of a Snivy. Jaroslava asked, "Why does it look like the green thingy I stepped on?"**

**"****You stepped on a Snivy?!"**

**"****No, it was a tiny tree thingy."**

**"****STOP SAYING THINGY ASSHOLE!"**

**"****But I like to say that!"**

**"****Yeah, and I'd like to kick your ass off a cliff into a pen full of hungry Houndooms, but I ain't doing that, am I?"**

**"****I don't think there is a pen full of Tall Black Dogs with Horns and Tails in this place."**

**"****I give the fuck up, where's the drugstore?"**

**"****What's a drugstore?"**

**"****You know, the place you get drugs like aspirin, Tylenol, allergy medication, addictive shit, and rare candies."**

**"****I think I know where a pile of Rare Candies are."**

**"****I need aspirin, rare candies I can get from grandpa."**

**"****What is a 'aspirin'?"**

**"****Medication to get rid of my headache."**

**"****Okaaaaaaaaaay."**

**And so they went on to a store, which happened to be a Pokémart. Before they went in, Yugo asked Ghezirha, "Anything you need?"**

**She asked, "Can we have lunch?"**

**"****Eh, depends if the food's good."**

**And so, the three went in and began their shopping hunt. Yugo went to get food, bitching at what they had available, and Jaroslava bought 65 Paralyze heals, 34 Great Balls, and 1 Pokéball. At the end at the checkout, Yugo had no letting getting food as Jaroslava heaved a huge bag of useless shit. **

**Yugo asked, "What's with the bag of useless shit?"**

**Jaroslava answered, "I don't know."**

**"****Mhm, like your head."**

**And thus they checked out. At the end, because the store did not have any food, Yugo killed a couple of Pidgey's, had Elene cook it, and everyone in Yugo's party ate while Jaroslava kept poking the dead bird. Yugo asked, "What's wrong?"**

**"****I'm just poking it to see what happens."**

**"****It's dead stupid, Elene cooked it, now you EAT it. Don't want to insult her."**

**Elene looked over as Jaroslava poked it a few more times. Yugo slapped himself as the Delphox asked, "Am I that bad?"**

**Yugo told her, "No, he's a dumbass, you'll never get used to it."**

**Jaroslava said, "But it's squishy!"**

**Elene asked, "So you're saying I didn't cook it enough?"**

**And Jaroslava continued to poke it.**

**After a confusing lunch, everyone got packed up and this time Keir was let out to go alongside Yugo. Yugo asked Jaroslava, "So, any Pokémon you're having out, or are you letting me be the fucking wall?"**

**Jaroslava answered, "I don't let my Pokémon out, except for battles."**

**"****Why?"**

**"****I don't know."**

**And so they… wait, they didn't know where to go. Yugo asked, "So… where do we go from here?"**

**Jaroslava shrugged, "I still don't know. If Spiky Ball of Sand was here, it would do something."**

**"****Where's the Pokécenter, they probably have a map."**

**"****Uhhhh…"**

**So they wandered around until they finally found a Pokémon center, and inside next to the PC was a map. Jaroslava pointed to the large red dot on it that read 'Fuchsia City' and stated, "I think we're here."**

**Yugo looked at him squinted, "No shit Sherlock. So let's see… where do we have to go?"**

**"****Uhhhhhh…"**

**"****God, I didn't think I'd get stuck with Patrick."**

**"****No, I'm smarted then Patrick!"**

**"****Forget it, I'll ask the nurse."**

**Yugo went up and asked, "Excuse me ma'am, has there been any cases of missing Pokémon before?"**

**The nurse said, "No."**

**"****Damn."**

**He grabbed Jaro's neck and dragged him out of the center, "Ok, new plan, start asking random people if there are any Pokémon that disappeared mysteriously."**

**Suddenly, the person who stole the Pokémon from before came. He asked, "Did anyone say Pokémon?"**

**"****Yeah, did you see any Pokémon disappear randomly?"**

**"****I'm the one who stole your Pokémon from before, remember? I'm here to take the rest."**

**Yugo pulled his deagle out and shot the guy in the kneecaps, then jumped on him and put the gun to his head, "Then tell me where the fuck they are or else I will blast your brains all over the fucking place!"**

**Grey told him, "They are at my 145****th****base."**

**"****Thanks!"**

**And Yugo blew his brains all over the street. Yugo said, "Ok, I got the instructions out of his head, let's attempt not to get lost."**

**Jaroslava replied, "Ok!"**

**So they traveled to Lavender Town, the city of lavender and ghosts.**

* * *

I'm going to try and punch out chapters a little faster since I am unable to write my other Pokémon story due to the Word malfunctioning, but once it stops acting up, the story might get slower update speed.

Rate/Review!


	3. Chapter 3

**CHAPTER THREE:**

**(At Lavender Town)**

**Sandslash and Reeka were exiting Lavender Town through the upper exit, and as they did so, Reeka asked, "So where exactly are we going?"**

**The Sandslash answered, "If we keep going up, we should reach Rock Tunnel. After that is Route 10 and the Power Plant."**

**"****Ok, and we should be able to find Yugo and your idiot."**

**"****I have no idea. I just know the location where we're heading."**

**Reeka rolled her eyes, then asked something different, "Slightly stupid question… is there anyone on the team that you… are with?"**

**"****What?"**

**"****Basically mates with."**

**"****I still don't get it."**

**"****Some girl you like!"**

**"****I don't even know what gender everyone else is."**

**"****How the hell don't you know which team member is a boy or girl?"**

**"****Because most of the battles Jaroslava does is a single battle."**

**"****Single battle?"**

**"****1V1."**

**"****Well, don't you usually spar against each other, fight each other, attempt to kill each other, talk, screw, I don't know, eat together, anything?"**

**"****No, unless there's a battle, Jaroslava never sends his Pokémon out."**

**"****Sheesh, why do you even stay with him then?"**

**"****I have to unless Jaroslava releases me."**

**"****Bullshit, you can just attack him and run away."**

**"****That's... not how it works."**

**"****Phef, says who?"**

**"****It's how the rules work."**

**"****Who made the rules?"**

**"****I don't know."**

**"****So break the rules, who gives a shit?"**

**"****I'm still not going to break it, just in case."**

**"****Why you scared?"**

**"****Maybe you get executed if you break the rules."**

**"****HA, yeah right, then I should've been shot myself a year ago."**

**"****Well, you probably live in another dimension so things are different there."**

**"****Oh, compared to this shit, yeah waaaay different."**

**"****Like what?"**

**"****From what I've seen, Pokémon can leave trainers at will, can be thrown in jail, can get jobs, become leaders of criminals, can get married to humans, and married in general, and one favorite thing I like is to be able to beat the trainer to hell if they do something that I don't like."**

**"****Did Pokémon take over the world where you live?"**

**"****No… we have something called… Equality Laws? Yeah, I think that's what it's called."**

**"****Here is simpler then what you're saying."**

**"****Eh, probably."**

**(Exiting Fuchsia City)**

**Yugo and Jaroslava were walking a pathway leading from the city, and as they walked, then Yugo struck up another conversation, "So… what are the rules here between people and Pokémon?"**

**Jaroslava answered, "Uhhhhhh…"**

**"****Don't you have any intelligence?"**

**"****I don't know."**

**"****Well, aren't there laws for Pokémon?"**

**"****Pokémon kill each other, is that a rule?"**

**"****No, that's a black Friday event for people… and replaced by Pokémon. I mean don't you have laws that give Pokémon rights… or is that too early?"**

**"****I don't think there's Pokémon laws."**

**"****Ok, it's too early then. So, how exactly did you become a trainer anyway?"**

**"****I got a trainer card, then my mom kicked me out of my house."**

**"****Ouch, I just talked to grandpa and got myself a Riolu. Nobody kicked me out."**

**"****Mom just wanted me out of the house so she could stop calling the Pokémon exterminators."**

**"****That… made no sense. She kicked you out so she can stop calling… exterminators?"**

**"****No, I brought wild Pokémon inside the house."**

**"****Oh, ok, now I understand; you're a dumbass."**

**"****I'm not dumb!"**

**"****Oh really?"**

**Yugo turned around and faced Jaroslava, "Ok, let's test that: what are the first three starters of Unova?"**

**"****U what?"**

**"****The region Unova."**

**"****Where?"**

**"****It's across from Kalos."**

**"****What are these places?!"**

**"****Regions."**

**"****Give me something easier."**

**Yugo sighed, "Ok, ok, what is the first Pokémon of any 'Dex?"**

**"****Uhhhhh... Spiky Ball of Sand?"**

**"****Wrong."**

**"****Give me another question but make it easier."**

**Yugo asked, "Down to the retarded level?!"**

**"****Yes."**

**He angrily sighed, "Ok, ok… what is 5+5?"**

**"****Uhhhhhh... 7?"**

**"****How the fuck did you get qualified to become a trainer?!"**

**"****I cheated on my trainer test."**

**"****Oh really? I never took a trainer test!"**

**"****So you don't have a trainer card?"**

**"****Or a license, but I'm more than hell more qualified to be a trainer than you."**

**"****But I defeated lots of trainers so I have to be smart!"**

**"****Yes, I took out two gyms and will be heading onto the third one, I'm gonna be challenging the GTA and plan to whoop grandpa's sorry ass while you can't answer a fucking four-year old problem!"**

**"****I defeated all 8 gyms."**

**"****How long have you been doing this?"**

**"****I don't know, maybe a month."**

**"****Alright, you win. But when I'll challenge you to a fight and show I'm better, and I'll bet all the money I got against all the money you got!"**

**"****Ok! I don't even have any money!"**

**Yugo wasn't impressed, "Ok, all your belongings."**

**"****You mean my backpack?"**

**"****No, everything in it!"**

**"****If you open it, then the bag will explode."**

**"****Why? You loaded it up with dynamite?"**

**"****No, I shoved a bunch of useless items, laptops, and a few other things in it."**

**"****God, my backpack has an old laptop, discs, food, money, crap, and spare Pokéballs, camping equipment, and a huge 'fuck you' from Grandpa, aka the ItalyDex."**

**"****Ok."**

**Afterwards, they continued walking down the path until another something happens. **

**(Time skip)**

**They arrived in Lavender town as Jaroslava said, "I remember this place! This was the place with the dead Pokémon and their ghosts with an old man!"**

**Yugo looked over and saw the tower of the city, "Oh yeah, it is. Why are we even here?"**

**"****To look at the ghosts?"**

**"****Oh yeah, that's what I need, more ghosts to possess my Pokémon, real smart dumbass."**

**"****Your Pokémon are ghosts?"**

**"****Uh, no, they're all alive."**

**"****But you said 'more ghosts to potassium my Pokémon'."**

**"****Possess stupid, not potassium. It's too long of a complicated story."**

**"****You were attacked by the ghosts of bananas? Is that how the story goes?"**

**Yugo slapped himself, "Ok, here's how it works, a ghost of an already dead Pokémon went into my living Pokémon and took it over and then was controlling it, and I apparently met my soon to be mother in-law."**

**"****What?"**

**"****Like I said, way too complex."**

**"****Ok."**

**Yugo shook his head and began walking to the tower because he might as well see it since he was here. And Jaroslava joined up and the two went into the tower. At the entrance, Yugo pulled out Ghezirha as she had a happy smile, "Hi Yugo!"**

**Yugo told her, "Ok, we're going in and they'll be a lot of ghosts, so try not to run out."**

**"****Um, are you sure about that?"**

**"****Worst case scenario, a ghost will possess this douchebag… on second thought, that might be best case scenario. Worst case, you get possessed and start attacking us. But since you're a dark type, none of that shit will happen. Now, let's go in."**

**And Yugo ran in as Ghezirha followed and Jaro followed unaccompanied. The first floor had a desk and people praying for their Pokémon. Jaroslava ran in circles around the room, then a tombstone from the second floor fell down and hit Jaroslava in the head.**

**Yugo looked at the mess, "What an idiot."**

**And walked right by as now they were entering the second floor. The second floor, to Yugo's amazement, had a shit ton of gravestones, but because everyone was busy standing, Yugo ran up to the third floor. Floor number 3 had fog covering most of the room, graves in the shape of a maze, and people who were possessed by Ghastlys. **

**Yugo walked carefully about, looking at the creepy people as they were staring at the air. Ghezirha was a little worried and told him, "I'm scared a little."**

**Yugo told her, "Yeah, I would be too, but I can see their heads and got a gun."**

**Suddenly, Jaroslava rode his bike up the stairs and almost ran Yugo and Ghezirha over. Yugo, being jumpscared, shot a bullet at the wall, which ricocheted off, and hit Jaroslava's bike's gear, which jammed it and it flung Jaroslava off the bike and into a possessed person. Without warning, the person sent out a Ghastly and had it use Night Shade on Jaroslava.**

**Yugo pulled his gun out and shot the person in the arms, then yelled, "Ghezirha, dark claw!"**

**With which, Ghezirha used on the Ghastly and it was flung off. Jaroslava started to mumbled random things, then got up and asked, "Who shot my bike?!"**

**Yugo yelled, "Well, first off why the fuck were you riding a bike up the stairs?!"**

**"****It was fun!"**

**"****What idiot rides up the stairs?"**

**"****Me!"**

**Yugo shook his head as he continued walking on, through the clouds and looking about as there were many people in the room, all standing. Yugo asked, "Is this the night of the living dead by any chance?"**

**Jaroslava asked, "How can the living be dead if they are living?"**

**"…"**

**Yugo looked at him with stupidity, "How about you shut your mouth up before I have Ghezirha claw it off."**

**Ghezirha said, "Um… how do I do that?"**

**"****Very carefully."**

**"****How?"**

**"****Nevermind."**

**He continued his walking and they entered floor level 4. The group went in and found a shit ton more graves. At the center, there was some blue stuff and people were standing there as usual. Yugo pulled his gun out as he asked, "Where the hell are we?"**

**But nobody answered. Yugo looked to the screen, "I was talking to myself asshole!"**

**Then a pinao fell on him. As it did, Ghezirha screamed, "YUGO! Are you ok?"**

**Yugo's head appeared from under, "Oh, I'm fine, I just got crushed by a piano like a fucking cartoon character, soooo fine. NOW GET THIS THING OFF ME DAMMIT!"**

**Suddenly, Jaroslava rode a Motorcycle up the stairs while shouted, "LOOK WHAT I FOUND!"**

**As he passed by, Yugo told Ghezirha, "Ok, he's useless, can you pull out everyone else and have them move this thing off me?"**

**She asked, "Um… how?"**

**"****Just open their balls please."**

**He passed the Pokéballs out and Ghezirha attempted opening each one, with each member of Yugo's team coming out. With all five of them, they sort of got the piano off Yugo and threw it aside. Yugo got up and packed everyone away, then saying, "Ok, let's… have someone else stay out… um…"**

**He pulled out two Pokéballs, releasing a Delphox and a Lopunny next to him. Jaroslava asked, "What are those two thingies?"**

**The two of them crossed their arms as Yugo explained, "Due to your retarded-ness, I'll explain. Elene is the Delphox, Jacques is the Lopunny, and both of them are a nice little couple. Good enough?"**

**"****But which one is a Delifox and Lopunny?"**

**"****Christ, ok, the taller one here that's orange is a Delphox, the other one is a Lopunny. Good enough?"**

**"****Ok. Where can I find one?"**

**"****Uh, Kalos I guess."**

**"****Kanto?"**

**"****No, there aren't any in Kanto… unless you get it imported."**

**"****What is a Kelpos?"**

**"****Not Kelpo, Kalos."**

**"****Kanlos?"**

**"****Kalos!"**

**Jacques asked, "Is he stupid or something?"**

**Yugo nodded, "Extremely."**

**Jaroslava asked, "Is it Kalons?"**

**"****NOT FUCKING COLONS!"**

**Elene asked, "Are you suuure you're with this guy?"**

**"****Unfortunately until I get Reeka back."**

**(Speaking of which…)**

**Reeka and Sandslash were through the Rock Tunnel as they were constantly feeling around and trying to get out blinded. After the tunnel, they continued their walk, until Reeka sat down and said exhaustingly, "Ok, resting time is now."**

**The Sandslash fell asleep. "Apparently it's nap time for you."**

**She laid down and closed her eyes as well, as the two of them went to sleep and the evening was coming over. **

**Likewise, Yugo set up a tent and told Jaroslava, "Ok, it's getting night, let's get to sleep."**

**Yugo, Jacques, and Elene got into the tent as Yugo put them away, and pulled Ghezirha out. Yugo laid out the sleeping bag, and Ghezirha went in as Yugo hugged her close. Jaroslava laid down on the grass and stared at the sky. Yugo called out, "Hey stupid, are you coming into the tent?!"**

**Jaroslava asked, "Who's stupid?"**

**"****You!"**

**"****Oh. Ok!"**

**He went into a Pokémon center and fell asleep on the couch there. Unfortunately for the douche, a doctor came along and found him, and ordered a Pokémon to use mega punch and that sent Jaroslava through a window and into a tree. In response, he wound up going in his werewolf form and attempted killing everyone in the center, but another doctor ordered a Machamp to use another mega punch, which knocked Jaroslava out and threw him into the dirt road, crashing head first into a tree. **

**And to top it off, he got struck by lightning and it began to rain tremendously. In the tent, Ghezirha asked, "What was that?"**

**Yugo smiled, in dream land, "What's what? I'm kicking the crap out of an ice cream cone."**

**"****Oh… what's ice cream?"**


End file.
